Where have I been???

Yikes! I told myself that I was going to keep up with this blog a little better than the last. So far, I am failing to do just that. I have been busy, busy, busy. I am in my second to last semester of nursing school and since its during the summer, a normally 16 week semester is crammed into 10 weeks leaving me a stressed mess. I am holding my own and doing very well, lets just pray I continue to do so.


Other updates:

 Veda is doing very well. She is talking non-stop from the time she is awake until the time she goes to bed. She is a big story teller and I LOVE to listen. She is potty training and doing wonderful at it. Most days she has no accidents but is still refusing to go number 2 on the potty. This summer she is enjoying swimming and playing at the park.

Grayson is growing and growing and I wish I could pause time for a moment. He is beginning to sit up with support, smiles all the time, and is such a momma's boy. He also loves his big sister. She always puts a smile on his face. These two babes melt my heart!

4 Months

I'm a little late in posting because I have been extremely busy with my fast paced semester and my kiddos. I cannot believe how fast the time is going with Grayson. It seems like just yesterday I was delivering him. He is such a blessing. He loves to snuggle with mommy, be carried in the sleepy wrap, smiles all the time, and has finally begun to share a giggle or two with us!! He is growing like a weed. I won't have his stats until next week after his 4 month appointment but I believe he is approaching doubling his weight. He is still nursing like a champ and I have no plans on starting him on solids anytime soon. It's funny that as soon as your baby turns 4 months, everyone is questioning when solids will start. Honestly, babies do not need to start on solids as long as they are nursing well the first full year. I will wait until at least 6 months to introduce veggies. I am in no rush for him to grow up.

Laughter

There is nothing better than a baby's giggle and although he hasn't done it since.....Grayson finally gave a big giggle on the May 25th. He coo's and "talks" to me all the time and gives these heart warming smiles that just make me melt. I will try and get some pictures up soon. I'm going to try and take some decent 4 month pictures in the next couple days.....yep you heard me. 4 months already (insert frown here). Time is flying by and I just want it to stand still.

So close.....yet so far away

In 6 1/2 months I will finally be able to call myself an RN. For those of you who don't know, I have been in and out of college since I graduated high school, which seems like many moons ago. So far I have achieved an associate of science and a phlebotomy certificate. None of which took me anywhere in life, except maybe a little more in debt. Shortly after Veda was born I went back to school, only this time I chose nursing school. At the beginning it was very hard to see any kind of light at the end of the tunnel. Nursing school is nothing like college. The testing is different, there are skill competencies, and tons of homework that doesn't count until you have a high enough grade on exams to pass the class. Somehow, I am proud to say that I have managed to hold a 3.8 GPA....I missed a 4.0 in ONE class by 1%.......irritating. So, in 61/2 months I hope to be posting graduation pictures. Can you wish me some luck?? I'm thinking I might need a little of that this semester...please?? Thanks in advance!

Change

My husband and I have decided to try the workout program P90X and today marks the finish of our first week! I am very proud of myself. Along with this new exercise routine I have once again taken on the challenge of weight watchers. I am on day 5 and have not gone over my points. I will weigh in every Sunday. I am thinking of posting a before and after picture but I don't know if I am that brave! I started the program last Sunday weighing 170.4......can't believe I am posting that......ah well....who cares. Its easier to do this whole thing since my hubby and I are being healthy together. I hope to continue to post about the outcome of my hard work!

Other changes that are taking place include friendships. I am feeling a little bitter about this one. Its a sad day when you realize you only have ONE truly amazing friend. I feel like I have always put so much effort into friendships and get very little back....and really??? you shouldn't have to put effort into being a friend, right? I think maybe that is too much for some to handle, but for me, that is the kind of friends I like to surround myself with. I am not a girl that likes drama. I have been out of high school many, many, many years and quite frankly I don't want to revisit. Ok. Vent over. I'm good now. Thanks blog for being here when I need you most! LOL.............................

My Babies

 Grayson Joseph 3 1/2 months
 Veda Elizabeth 2yrs 4 months                                   

Parenting

Well as I mentioned before, I have a 2 yr old, and with that comes the terrible part right? In my case yes! She is the most amazing, most challenging, and most strong willed little girl I have the pleasure of calling her my daughter. We have had many struggles with behavior lately. Where the heck does she learn such phrases like "FINE"! or "WHATEVER"! as she stomps to her room with her arms firmly folded??? I certainly do not display this kind of behavior. She also runs from us when its time to get dressed or time to go to bed, throws her sippy cup on the floor if its contents do not appeal to her, and refuses to eat anything called a vegetable unless bribed.

So now your all thinking "oh my goodness, she IS terrible" BUT, at the end of the day Veda is the most wonderful, sweet, cuddly little girl there could be. She is full of hugs, kisses and I love you's!! I am so blessed to be her mommy.

With all of this negativity from Veda we have had to make some choices on how to discipline and that in itself is a huge challenge. We have tried everything, YES everything. Here I admit that I have even spanked her, which I DO regret. I don't even believe in spanking because my mom was abusive and I WILL NOT be traveling down that road. Spanking isn't the answer anyway, it teaches our children to hit, and don't we teach our children that hitting is unacceptable??? So there is a huge double standard.

So what works for us? We are still figuring it out. What works one day may not work the next. Time outs are becoming pretty effective but its very exhausting. Worth the work, but exhausting! So I will end this post by saying.....being a stay at home mom is the hardest job in the world, there are no sick days, no paid vacations, no 8 hr work days BUT we do get a bonus.......those extra hugs, kisses, and I love you's that come amongst the fits throughout the day and I wouldn't trade it for the world! I am blessed beyond words that I have had the chance to be a stay at home mom while finishing my nursing degree.

Our Story

Welcome to my blog! I will start off by sharing our story. My name is Tabitha, I am happily married to Joe and we have three children. Our first, Nathan joined the angels at 18 weeks gestation on September 11, 2006. This was a journey that I would never wish on my worst enemy . The pregnancy started off horribly since I began having problems with bleeding very early on. During one of the many ultrasounds I had, my obstetrician diagnosed the bleeding as a subchorionic hematoma (blood clot),which in most cases resolves on its own. Unfortunately, in our situation the blood clot continued to grow. In the end it caused the placenta to detach from my uterus, causing Nathan to lose all oxygen and nutrition he was receiving from the placenta. My life is forever changed. Not a day goes by that I do not think about the son that I never got to know.

After losing Nathan we decided trying to conceive again and became pregnant fairly quickly and took another blow when losing the pregnancy to a miscarriage. We tried again. Miscarriage again. We tried again. Veda was born January 8, 2008. Perfect. Beautiful. 6lbs 13oz, 19 1/4 in. What a blessing she is. The pregnancy went along without a flaw. This of course doesn't mean that I wasn't completely neurotic about every little twinge! I constantly was at the office making sure that she was okay. Until I held her in my arms, the whole thing was surreal.

When Veda was just over a year old we decided trying to conceive a sibling for her. Low and behold, we were pregnant a few short months later. The beginning was a bit scary and we believed we were experiencing another failed pregnancy. I went in for an early ultrasound and they found nothing but an empty space were the baby should have been growing. The obstetrician asked me to come back in a week to see if there was any growth. I went back. We progressed. The rest of the pregnancy went off without a hitch! I didn't have the constant fear that I was going to lose my baby and the best part was that I actually enjoyed my pregnancy! Grayson made his debut on February 3, 2010. Perfect. Big. Gorgeous. 9lbs 1oz, 20 1/2in.

Our kids are our lives and we live each day for them. We have had many trials and tribulations but its all worth it. Right now I am focusing on being the best mommy, wife, and future nurse that I can be.